Being in the hot Seat/the sausage experience

Waynesboro, Virginia:

During the last days I received and also gave my first official rebirthing breathing sessions. All of them added value to my life, as I see more clearly now where I still have resistances and blockages, emotionally as well as physically. Whereas my first two breathing sessions were all about the physical body and purification, I now started to find emotional barriers, old thought patterns and believes in my subconscious, that have run my life for too long. As a child I chose to take on many unreasonable personal laws that now affect my life in stupid ways. Supposedly it had been easier that way, as I didn´t have to take on responsibility that way. Allow me to show you how I finally came to realize it, being fiercely burned like a sausage.


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Fire and Air-Cleansing


In Yoga as well as rebirthing there exist different techniques of cleansing the body and mind. Air cleansing for example is a conscious way of breathing like Pranayama and rebirthing. It rids the body of toxins and fills it up with energy. Fire cleansing on the other hand is done by exposing ones body to the fire. Simply sitting with it the fire the burns away lot of pollution and negativity, clearing both body and mind.

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Rebirthing USA

Last Wednesday I embarked on my journey to the International Rebirthing Center in Staunton, Virginia.


To those who are not familiar with what rebirthing is, here a short introduction:

Rebirthing-Breathwork is one of the most valuable self-healing techniques humans can learn. Breathing is a basic healing instrument and the most natural one as well, given to us from birth. However during our lives we took on harmful breathing patterns. Everyone in our modern world is familiar to stress and we all react to it either by holding our breath in or breathing shallow and fast. Rebirthing by contrast merges inhale with exhale in a continuous flow, increasing the oxigen level within our bloodstream. Many physical ailments can be healed through repeated rebirthing sessions. And Rebirthing not only heals the body, but the mind as well. It opens up our subconscious and allows us to weed out old childhood programming and conditioning, that does not serve as any longer. Psychology proved that most bad habits and behavioral patterns are rooted in our childhood. Unfortunately and as they are residing in the realm of the subconscious it is not possible to consciously get rid of them. To reprogram ourselves the subconscious needs to be reached. Rebirthing has that power. It can heal our traumas and program the mind for prosperity, contentment, health, success and peace of mind. In the end the mind, our most frequent thought and emotional patterns create the world we live in. Letting the breath Energy move in our own body and mind has magical, mystical, and miraculous effects.

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A New Life

This Sunday marked the end of a beautiful period of my life spent in Würzburg, the first and only city I called home so far. Four years full of lovely events, namely theatre plays, studying to become a nurse for children, teaching yoga, giving workshops and above all sharing this time with amazing people. Friday most of my friends gathered in an already empty room – my stuff had already gone, packed and stuffed into boxes and loaded into one little car. It felt like great freedom to only have as much as to fill a car and to get rid of old, unneeded, sentimental items.


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This text is dedicated to friendship, especially to all those amazing friends who chose to be a part of my life. Thank you all for showing me the meaning of home! I believe there are few things more empowering and beautiful than connecting and getting together with you glorious bunch. To me these special relations appear to be a source of happiness, spirituality and most of all love. A life without you would be an empty one.

Diesen Text widme ich der Freundschaft und insbesondere all den wunderbaren Menschen, die sich entschieden haben mich auf meinem Weg als Freunde zu begleiten. Danke euch, dass ihr mir immer wieder zeigt was es heißt ein zu Hause zu haben! Ich glaube es gibt wenige Dinge, die schöner sind als mit euch zusammen zu kommen meine Besten. Mir scheinen diese Verbindungen eine Quelle wahren Glücks, spiritueller Erfahrungen und v. a. Liebe zu sein. Ein Leben ohne euch wäre ganz schön bedeutungslos.


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Lucid Gathering Berlin


Yesterday the beautiful lucid gathering at the edge of Berlin took part. Not expecting anything a few beloved friends and Yogis took off at noon for the far out lakeside event. Auspiciously perfect, we arrived just in time for the cacao ceremony.

Gestern hatte ich das große Glück am wunderschönen Lucid Gathering am Rande von Berlin teilhaben zu dürfen. Ohne große Erwartungen brach eine kleine Gruppe aus Freunden und Yogies am Mittag zur Seeveranstaltung auf. Fast schon wie vorbestimmt kamen wir genau pünktlich zur Kakao Zeremonie dort an.

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The New Man/Der neue Mann


The new man heals his being, the planet and cleans up after himself. He is a role model for young men. rigorously honest and fiercely optimistic. He faces his darkest shades and wounds, using their power as a tool for transformation.

Der „neue“ Mann erforscht sein Inneres, er schützt den Planeten und räumt hinter sich auf. Er ist ein Vorbild, kompromisslos authentisch und unglaublich positiv eingestellt. Er stellt sich seinen Dämonen, nimmt seine Traumata wahr und schöpft aus ihnen die Kraft für Transformation.

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At times the deeply routed wounds of the past surface. When they do I don´t always feel ready. I might want to hide from myself as I can´t accept my own perfection. Nevertheless I am available in that moment to be healed and need only stay open, vulnerable and sensitive. Thus the loving presence of life can bring about relaxation and peace, dissolving struggle and suffering. Keeping such an open attitude anyone can be healed and help others to also become whole and healthy. In fact is there anything more gratifying than sharing those insights you gained with other.

Look in the mirror, be brave and face your own inner truth. The truth is that you are perfect already. Stop believing anything else, keeping yourself small. That won´t serve anyone, but walking by example as an authentic being you encourage others to do the same.

Yes indeed it takes courage to emerge into the light, as you face your deepest core, naked. It won´t always be pleasent either. Like a seed that sheds off its cask, it is dangerous to grow and leave the shelter of known commodity. Avoiding or denying these dangers won´t do. Only by looking at our own “shit” we become the possibility we are born to be. Moving out of the comfort zone, by looking at it, it can go. Growth happens.

It is a pilgrimage to the most intimate part of yourself, that you may best undertake unconcerned without any concept of a goal. Just walking step by step, the aim will reveal itself in due time. It is an adventure of acceptance, of embracing what is. This attitude invites the right people and events at the right time. This magic of life spreads through my own life more and more as I grow older.

As I reflect about my past, I realize that my deepest wounds have become my biggest strengths. It is only now that I am able to say no to people and events that are abusive and pain inflicting. I simply allow them to go without regret or grudge. In speaking up, I am not arrogant or egocentric but aware that my own integrity and wholeness is the greatest gift I have. Losing it would hurt all areas of my life and others too.

No one is allowed to harm your being. You are ever perfect beloved friend.

Finding a new vocation


In these months to come I am finishing my degree in child nursing at the university hospital Würzburg. It has been a time with many ups and downs and I am excited to wrap it up. Now this weekend I went to Berlin in order to have a couple of job interviews and find the place I will be staying for the next few years. Funny enough we had our last theater show Friday night and my train was set to leave for Berlin at 5 am next morning. Due to an old theater tradition, one has to celebrate the very last show and thus I left 3.30 in the morning with my beloved friends to take a shower, pack things up and then make a move by train for Berlin. I was so tired that I could hardly program the alarm, waking me up every time I needed to switch trains. However luck was on my side and I made every connection but the very last, because the train was delayed. Therefore I called the boss of my likely future job. Unfortunately this job is also my most favourized one and thus coming too late, could become a very shitty experience. To make the long story short, I could not reach her via phone nor via e-mail. I simply had enough faith that everything would somehow work out and continued for Bad Sarow anyhow, a small picturesque suburb of Berlin. The place I long to work is a Buddhist center specialized in Palliative care and founded by the famous Sogyal Rinpoche, a student of H. H. the Dalai Lama, who wrote the tibetan book of life and death.

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The student asked the Zen Master:                                                                                                         What shall I do when I am old And still not enlightened?”                                                          The Zen Master replied:Jump for joy”


There are times when I seem to fail in all areas of my life, relationship, work, love you name it.

We all face such periods. It seems like an endless storm.

Honestly the worst state appears when I catch myself not living up to my own high standards, falling short, having lost my personal edge. (Doesn´t matter how high those standards are, they are still mine I think)

It really sucks, cause it is not comfortable.

“There is the story of a lion who grew up with sheep”

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